VH1 saves the day!

Now that we have a remote control I've started watching a little TV here and there and each time it happens I can feel a part of my soul dying. With the never-ending commercials, and empty, mindless reality TV stars, I have almost completely lost all hope in my generation. Thankfully, some genius at VH1 thought it would be sweet to film a show where fratty-tooly-tards get a good, wet dick slapping in each episode! VH1's Tool Academy might actually give me a new reason to live! Here is the premise of the show:

"The guys, all secretly nominated by their girlfriends, initially believe they are taking part in a competition in search of “Mr. Awesome.” But the tables are turned almost immediately and they quickly learn that they are actually recruits in the Tool Academy, where they will be schooled in proper boyfriend behavior—covering topics like honesty, fidelity, maturity, and communication with resident relationship counselor Trina Dolenz. Each week the guy who shows the least progress in the group is deemed a hopeless tool and dismissed from the academy. But there’s a twist: he must then plead his case before his girlfriend, who decides on the spot if she wants to keep him or kick him to the curb. In the end, only one man will be rewarded for his transformation with a $100,000 cash prize and the title of “Mr. Awesome.”"

FUCK ME SIDEWAYS! The picture above really sends me into douche overload and the only way to remedy that is by watching this show. Each tool in the picture looks like someone queefed them into existence and then instantly sent them into the nearest Structure. Poor toolies! Tune in January 11th 10/9c.